Too Late For You and Me
by Nindira
Summary: Five years without knowing Sam's whereabouts Carly finally finds her, she can ask her what happened but Sam only answer is "life". Now they're too different and too damaged, they're just too late. - CAM
1. We'll be okay

**Hi guys this is my first attempt at a multi-chapter Cam fic, it's****_really_****at progress so I hope to get inspired enough to make decent updates.**

***Warning for swearing and violence and adult themes in future chapters so rate must change**

**.**

She really shouldn't be here, that's probably what every single person in her life would be telling her if they knew where she was. But there is one person missing in her life, and it's the very reason she's making her way between the crowds of people, men and women drinking, screaming and laughing, anyone could tell she didn't fit in; almost everyone in the place dressed in shredded pants and worn out shirts with tattoos and piercings, while she was in her nice fit jeans, white blouse and red jacket.

This is the kind of place _she_ never wanted her to be.

She won't lie, she was scare, every man leering at her while she passed, laughing and grabbing her, but she continued her way through the damped place. She made it to larger doors at the back of the place, pushing them open and remembering how a long time ago she wouldn't be scared of her situation because a long time ago she had someone who would protect her.

_Exiting the large doors_ _Carly made her way outside the concert, show was over, people leaving but as always a few remained to continue partying on their own. The scenery after the concerts have changed now at seventeen, drunken kids with drunker friends outside their cars looking for not so bright things to do, she and Sam always tried to stay away from that crowd, well__ Carly __more than Sam but she did so whenever she hang out with Carly._

_She was walking to her car to wait for Sam there as the blonde girl had to take a quick but "urgent" run to the girl's bathroom. She walked while looking for her keys inside her bag, finding them but bumping into someone making her drop them._

"_I'm sorry" she quickly said by reaction, looking up at the person she bumped into._

"_It's okay gorgeous" Great she thought, one of the drunker friends, she bend in attempt to pick up the keys but the boy was quicker, raising them way above her "Here you go" he said but making no attempt to return them. She raised her hand to the keys only to have them move away from her reach "Don't I know you?" was his only response._

"_I don't think so" She said quickly while trying again to grab the keys from the boys hand without success_

"_Yeah I do, you're the chick from that web show" his eyes scanned her from head to toed "You grew up just fine"._

_She just rolled her eyes before talking "Could you just give me my keys __back" she said annoyed a harsh look in her eyes._

_The boy made a mocking gasp while getting closer "Well I'm hurt, here I am just trying to make conversation" he got even closer breathing into Carly's space, the strong scent of alcohol reaching her as his hands in her waist pressing her to him "Get to know us"_

_She put her hands between them to push him away from him but she wasn't strong enough "Don't touch me" she sneered into his face while still struggling his hold on her._

"_Oh come on, we can have so much fun" he put his head on her neck trying to kiss it when suddenly he was yanked from her, Carly stepping backwards watching as Sam kicked on the boys knees making him stomp to the ground grunting "You bitch" were the last words to come out of his mouth before Sam took the back of his head to connect it with her raising knee knocking the boy to the ground in pain, blood coming from his nose._

"_She said to not touch her, jerk" the last word was shouted because Carly already had Sam's arm on her grip yanking her to run from the place before either Sam continued hitting him or the boy friends decided to step in._

_Both made it to the car, quickly going inside, Carly on the driver's side igniting the motor and driving out of the parking lot, after some minutes on the road did they turn to look at each other with a grim look before suddenly erupting into laughter._

_They arrived to a close hill with a nice sightseeing of the city, nothing touristic which made the place quiet and peaceful, exiting the car and hopping on the car hood, lying on it._

"_Thank you" Carly said turning to look at Sam with a smirk on her face "You're my hero"_

_Sam grins without looking her "I only leave you for a few minutes…" she trails off shaking her head before continuing "You're such a troublemaker Shay"_

_Carly only snorts laughing before talking "You know me, Carly Shay lost cause" she raises her head looking up as Sam straightens against the car windshield before taking out a cigarette and a lighter getting fixated as she carefully lights up the tip and the way her chest raises inhaling through the cigarette, Sam exhales the smoke through her mouth before turning to Carly and steadily pressing the cigarettes to the other girl's mouth letting her take a small intake knowing it's was the only she would take, the habit not particularly pleasant for her._

_Carly knew it was silly but it made her feel closer to Sam and it was already established the blonde wouldn't give it up so this way Sam smoked less than she usually would not wanting for Carly to actually smoke any harmful amount._

"_Talking about lost causes" The blond started taking a crumpled sheet from her pocket and passing it to Carly, the brunet grabbing it while suppressing a smile at the state of the wrinkled paper before smoothing it and starting to read it._

_A shriek could be heard startling Sam making her cough some of the smoke out "Oh my god Sam, this is amazing" the brunet rapidly sat up straight turning to Sam a smile plastered on her face "You know what this means" the blonde opened her mouth but not really talking as Carly continued "You can go to college"_

"_Easy there" Carly smile lessened "This means that I'm actually graduating, nothing more" Sam responded dully but then she continued with a lopsided smile "but maybe if I got a part time job and I pressure my mom a little to actually work" she could see the brunets smile raising again "I mean it's not going to be easy but yeah… maybe" she raised her shoulder before lowering them again._

_Carly shrieked again and enveloped Sam into a tight hug._

_They stayed like that for a while, with Carly's head nursed inside Sam's neck and the other on the other girl's shoulders, their hot breaths against each other, turning their heads, face and lips close together but without touching and neither one noticing the moment the tone of their hug became heavy but not being the first time it happened "What am I going to do with you Shay? Always getting me in trouble"_

_Carly chuckles before answering "I have no idea" her eyelids heavy with doubt before slightly pressing her lips at the corner of Sam's lips kissing them softly before parting, faces still close together looking into the blondes eyes "We'll be okay… we'll figure it out" even if she was meant to go away for college,__in that moment they both believed those words._

_And they would have stayed like that if they knew that was the last time they believed them._

Doors closing behind her Carly looked at the mass of people infront of her, more than in the room before, shouting and screaming, raising hands with money in them and surrounding a large cage arena, and the moment she entered the room, Carly knew she was in the right place.

All the people where shouting the same thing.

"Puckett, Puckett, Puckett!"

.

**Hope it looks engaging enough; please review with your thoughts or questions so this turns better**

**Thanks**


	2. It's gonna hurt

**Hi there, still working on this fic, got into a rough patch but hope i can continue it, im gonna surely try. Thank you for your reviews and hope you enjoy**

From her place at the entrance she couldn't see past the back of some people heads, so she started making her way between them, getting some nasty glances has she parted her way to the front of the crowd '_come on Carly' _she couldn't stop the memories and flashes of a younger Sam facing her, '_We're close to stage' _she could almost reach the hand offered to her before disappearing reminding her it was only a memory.

She made it to front of the crowd and in front of the cage ring, she felt nervous and agitated, blood rising to her head making it difficult to focus her vision past the wire fence, the noise around her dimming.

Her focus returns slowly, she first sees two pair of feet moving and raising her head she could make out two slim bodies facing each other, circling each other weary and when she spots the familiar strands of blonde hair tied in a bun the noise and her focus return in an instant with complete force.

There was Sam, on the ring exchanging punches with another women, both on training clothes and for a second Carly's mind deceives her because she thinks 'who in her right mind would fight Sam Puckett' but her mind is quickly gained at the fact that this is what they do here, this is what the place it's for.

She can't help but immediately look for every difference between the memory of her former best friend and the woman in front of her, at first glance you can't notice much but after watching carefully she sees them; Sam always had look strong but know her body looked tone, her body slimmer, the baby fat from her face gone, maybe even taller than Carly remembered, she even fights different of how she remembers no impulsive movements or punches, no, she was analyzing every movement and position from her rival, but the main change were in her eyes, her blue eyes looked darker, not the bright blue Carly always remembered.

Just as Sam avoids a punch, the body of the woman bending to the side and leaving her line vision clear Sam's eyes widen looking directly at Carly, the crowd moving wildly around her but she maintained still almost like a statue, she could almost feel everything go into slow motion except for the two of them as their eyes locked.

A thousand of thoughts should invade her head but it was really all blank but of a single thought "Carly", the words came out of a whisper and Carly barely could make out Sam's lips moving, it feel like an eternity just looking at each other while in reality just fraction of seconds passed and Sam almost forgot where she was because she definitely wasn't expecting the strong fist hitting her upper eye, feeling the skin in her eyebrow break, bringing her down, a small part of the crowd suddenly cheering and another confused.

There are deep red dots on the carpet before she sees red and one would think someone would stop the fight at the sight of blood but not here and not her, this is what the people are here for after all, and the more blood the better. The woman standing takes the opportunity to continue hitting Sam on the ground, the blonde still out of it.

"Sam" she's sure it's her imagination and she's sure it's impossible for her to hear it but the sound of her name coming from Carly's lips it's what's snaps her out, grabbing the woman's leg bringing her to the ground, crawling on top of her and returning the punches, the woman under her trying to block them with her arms but being unable to and when the lips of the women start pouring blood does she brings her palm on the ring floor three times before a bell sounds, Sam stands and exist the cage as quickly as she can, running actually no having the strength or will to look any other direction, she walks directly to the back where only the contestant and staff can enter.

She makes it to the lockers and starts pacing and biting her thumb nail, questions running through her head, how did she found her?, why was she there?, probably to scream at her how much she hated her, she hoped not but she wouldn't blame her for it.

But then she couldn't help but think how good it felt seeing her again, she was still beautiful, her pale skin and brown eyes, but her face wasn't the expression of hate, it was of sadness, and that was even worse. She tried to remember the last time she saw her truly happy and she remember it because it was the same day everything changed.

"_Come on Sam, just give it back" Carly said trying to sound annoyed but she couldn't hold the smile escaping out. _

_Sam jumped on the bed making Carly bounce on it while continuing reading the piece of paper in her hand "_…and our learning it's not over as we must learn as long as we may live'…_ ugh are you serious, we must study for the REST of our lives?" Sam made a painful look that only made Carly laugh._

"_It's a graduation speech, it's supposed to be deep and __philosophical_" Carly raised both eyebrows watching Sam continuing jumping on the bed

"_I don't see anything philosophical about torturing yourself '_as long as you live_'" Sam argue raising an eyebrow, while she continue jumping she didn't notice Carly's hands grabbing her ankles, pulling them and making her fall back into the mattress, knocking some air out of her lungs. She watched as Carly joined her propping her head with her arm giving her some height over the blonde while looking down at her eyes_

"_Is that so?" Carly asked giving Sam a smirk_

"_Yeah… I mean, it has its perks sometimes" Sam said getting closer to Carly's face_

"_Like knowledge and wisdom?" Carly raised an eyebrow to the blonde_

"_Nah, I mean like late night studies sessions" Sam pecked at Carly's bottom lip before talking again "you know those that involve minimum studying" Sam slowly kissed Carly's grin while she laughed at her antics rolling her eyes at the blonde but returning the kiss, her grin slowly disappearing and becoming breathless._

_They parted looking into each other's eyes, the joking banter replaced by something more that left Carly dizzy "I could get used to those" she tried lost at better words to say but Sam confused eyes told her she was already on other train of thought._

_While brushing a string of hair behind Carly's hear Sam's thoughts were on her skin, eyes, hair, lips, everything Carly. The mere contact made Carly feel a rush of heat that made want to kiss Sam's neck moving fully on top of the blonde and lowering her head to said spot making Sam unconsciously tilt her head back giving her more access._

_It wasn't long before Carly's kisses became little nibbles that made Sam gasp and feeling Carly's hands starting to roam on the hem of her shirt and then under it, fingers over her ribcage. She had to muster all her strength and with a grunt she rolled over Carly switching their positions propping herself with her hands on either side of Carly's head, because this usually takes longer and its exactly where they stopped "We should slow down" Sam's voice was a little hoarsen._

_"Why?" Sam was finding it hard thinking an answer for that question with Carly under her, her hair sprawled over the pillow, and a mischievous smile and her face._

_"'Cause if we don't I might not be able stop later" Sam said it with a grin on her face and it was meant for joke._

"_Maybe I don't want you too" Sam whole body became stilt, face becoming instantly shocked seeing Carly's face serious before feeling her hand travel her arm. _

"_Sam?"_

"Sam?!" A voice brought Sam back from her thoughts turning but finding it wasn't who she expected to "What's wrong?"

Turning with a sigh Sam started changing opening one of the lockers and retrieving clothes from it "Nothing" she said in a dismissive tone.

"Nothing? I haven't seen you let beat out like that in a long time... I thought we were pass that"

"I am!" closing the locker hard, Sam turned with a hard look and really looked into the older women's eyes in front of her, Jen, who has been her friend for the past two years, no, friend didn't cover it, she have helped Sam when the girl most needed it "I win, didn't I?"

"You always win Sam, now what's really going on?" Jen voice rose over the blonde's who became silent for several seconds "Well?"

"She's out there" Sam's voice became low, barely audible and shaky.

"Who?" Jenna furrowed her eyebrows in confusion.

Sam hesitates for a moment pursing her lips and chewing them before talking "Carly" she sits on the locker room bench exhaling all the air from her lungs.

"Carly? Carly wh… oh… oooh" understanding showed on her face before changing it into worry "Are you okay?" she joined her on the bench.

Sam only rolled her eyes

"No of course you're not?" the older woman shook her head while talking and started examining Sam's cut over her eye, tilting the blonde's head up examinig it before standing looking for some aid kit and bandages "What you're going to do?"

"I really don't know" She answered while maintaining the position she was left on and watching the other woman return and work on the wound, their exchange on automatic, rehearsed thousand times before probably.

After a few minutes she finished patching Sam's wound "It might hurt" Sam's head lowers down quickly at the other woman's words causing her fingers to brush over the wound, Sam hissing at the process "That too".

"Isn't it already?" Sam's words and double meaning hanging in the air.

Jen gives her a sympathetic look as she stands and makes its way to the exit stopping for a second and turning "whatever you're going to do it requires you to go out there and remember you're covering for Anna tonight at the bar"

Sam only tilted her head back cursing some words under her breath "I won and I'm injured" she throws the words at the air.

"And you also were the one who told her and I quote ´stop being a wimp and have the baby" Jen told her before continuing her way.

"Well clearly my advises are not usually the best, are they?" Sam shouted before lowering her head and staring into the ground, her mind really only in one thing that leaves her in a whisper "Carly"


	3. Some things don't change

**Hi hope someone is still interested in this**

**.**

It took Sam 20 minutes and some more pacing before she made it out of the locker room, looking instantly at the place where she'd seen Carly previously but with no luck, or maybe it was luck not finding her, she was not sure the wrench she felt in her chest to be relieve or pain.

Another fight had started and the place was still packed with people, she walked to the front and into the bar area where people raised their mugs and beers at the sight of her, it's easy getting into peoples good side when you are making them win money and just as easy getting into others bad when you don't. She would normally stop and greet some but her mind was elsewhere quickly searching and scanning the people, she made it to the bar without finding her, she started thinking that maybe she dreamed the whole thing, it wouldn't be the first time, but no, she knew it was real.

"Sam come on, the place it's always packed when you fight" Jen says on the other side of the counter as she tosses three beers at Sam who catches them just in time and taking them to the table near her. She then joins Jen at the bar and begins filling mugs with beer putting them in the trays as Tony and Marge, the other two workers on tonight take them to the destined tables.

Sam's knows how the bar works by heart and it's a good thing because she was in autopilot, not really paying attention to anything else but the orders, only shooting her head at the entrance whenever the sound of the door opening reached her hears a disappointed look yet relieved breath leaving her.

"Is everything alright?" Sam's heads turns from the entrance to her left where Tony was giving a worried look. Sam always wondered why Tony was serving beers at a bar instead of making tv commercial and movies, the boy was really good looking, with his sandy blonde hair, blue eyes, tall and ripped and the boyish grin on his face, he had many female and some of the male clients as regulars at the bar.

"Of course, why wouldn't it be?" Sam avoided eye contact with him walking from one end of the bar to the other a little taken back when looking up Tony was already there leaning against it, looking back and forth from his previous spot to him.

"Well for one, you're extremely quiet, two, you keep looking towards the door every time someone comes in and three, you said _why wouldn't it be_ which it usually means there are actual reasons for it to not be" Tony said lifting one finger each time he listed his points "Is someone bothering you again about the fights? Do you want me to kick someone's ass?" both blondes locked eyes before Sam started slowly raising her non wounded eyebrow "Okay, Okay, so maybe I leave the ass kicking to you" he raises both hands in front of him "But really if you need.."

"I'm fine, I'm just a little bang up from the fight" just as Sam finished talking the sound of the door opening makes her head jerk involuntarily towards it seeing yet another client come in.

"Yeah sure" Tony just kept looking at her before retreating to continue serving beer to the tables without her even noticing, continuing looking at the door that opened once more.

_Sam entered the low life bar, one or two curious sets of eyes on her and her bag pack, she just arrived to town and like always she made it to the lowest part of it, where the cheapest places to stay are and where the bars didn't really checked for ids, not that she needed to anymore, she might have just turned twenty one but she haven't looked like a teenager for a while. __Sitting on a stool at the bar a beer is quickly delivered to her, she barely glanced at the waiter before starting drinking; the place was a little packed but the bar was empty which made Sam annoyed as hell when a couple choose to sit right next to her, all giddy and touchy with each other, after a while the girl left and the boy started looking around him spotting Sam, giving her a glance over and giving a flirtatious smile which annoyed her even more, choosing to ignore him she just continue drinking but he just stepped closer to her._

"_You're new here" He stated, making her rolled her eyes as if it wasn't obvious._

"_No shit" Sam mock him still not bothering to look at him._

"_You know if you need someone to show you around, maybe..."_

"_You know I don't think your girlfriend would be too happy about it" Sam stared coldly at the boy, startling him, his stance changing suddenly and putting himself on Sam's face._

"_I think I can handle my girlfriend" His voice was a little angered when just in cue the girl returned, serious look in tow, making the boy take a step back instantaneously._

"_What's going on here?" She said while looking between between his boyfriend and Sam._

"_Nothing hun, just making conversation" he answered immediately gaining a snort from Sam, it was obvious to her that he was nervous and judging for her stance and muscles, Sam could tell the girl probably could kick the boys ass without problem._

"_More like he seems to be quite bored with you seeing how he starts flirting within seconds of being alone" Sam is practically laughing at both of them without leaving her drink, the face of the girl completely angered by now._

"_I don't think you know who you're messing with" The girl says now using her height and standing position as to threaten Sam, Sam only watches as the boy takes the opportunity to back out from the girls and muttering "pathetic" under her breath turns back to the girl._

"_Actually no, I can say I do" Sam told her before standing, getting at the same height as the girl "But I could say the same thing to you" Sam voice was dangerous making the girl back off a little and start turning but before she made any move to leave she turned back suddenly, bringing her fist towards Sam's face who lifted up her hand with her drink using it as a shield and making the girl crash her hand against the bottle, shattering, all the content spilling over the sliced hand of the girl who cried in pain "See what you did? I wasn't finish with that" the girl screamed in anger charging towards Sam who dodged her, crashing against the bar railing and turning to surely charge again but was meet with one strong fist sending her unconscious to the ground._

_Sam turned to see if the boy meant business but he was already running out the door, that's when she noticed everyone's eyes on her, not only did they looked at her weird but everything and everyone seemed to have stopped what they were doing to watch the altercation between the girls, which made Sam curious because surely fights weren't something out of the ordinary for a place like this and they were certainly not out of the ordinary for her._

_Thinking it was better to leave, she managed for her pack when a voice broke the silence spell it seemed to have fallen upon the place "What the…?" said a woman exiting a door at the other side of the bar that Sam hadn't noticed, she looked shocked at the girl on the ground, "Tony take Anna to the back" she told somewhat annoyed to the boy at the bar while she strode towards it. Everyone started to carry on with their activities only glancing as the boy took the girl towards another door stopping just to say something into the woman's ear while passing her, the woman glancing instantly at Sam and taking the place behind the bar while she opened another beer and placed in front of Sam eyeing her curiously "I'm sorry about Anna, she get a little jumpy when it concerns her crappy boyfriend"_

_Sam looked weirdly at the woman before seating again in the stool and taking the beer "I could see that"_

_The woman smiled "So are you passing or staying in town?" she asked while nodding towards Sam's bag pack_

"_Haven't decided actually" Sam voice was quiet while responding more to herself than the woman_

_The woman only tilted her head like studying the girl sitting in front of her "That means this isn't your first city then"_

_Sam looked up, her attention once more in the conversation "Noup"_

"_And I'm guessing that wasn't your first fight either"_

_Sam snorted a little "oh no, definitely not"_

_She woman eyed her curiously for a minute, like deciding on something before speaking "Come with me"_

_Sam shook her head before swinging her bottle for a drink and placing it the counter "Look, you look like a nice lady" the woman suppressed a laugh at Sam words "but I´m really not looking to making friends here"__  
_  
_"Obviously" said the woman gesturing to the mess that was left after the fight "The beer is on the house"_

_Sam stared blank at the woman before responding "You're a good woman" Sam followed the woman to the same door she exited some minutes ago and behind it a scene she only had seen on movies._

_A big round ring was in the middle of the room surround it by a fence, people around it screaming at the two men fighting inside it, money flowing like she has never seen, her eyes wide for a minute before the woman talked again "Fridays are the women fights" Sam started chewing the inside of her mouth "If you decide to stay that is"_

_The woman left Sam returning to the bar, she watched one more fight before going outside sitting on a bench placed next to the entrance; it was a little cold so she adjusted her jacket before digging inside the right pocket for her lighter and the pack of cigarettes pulling one out and playing it between her fingers before lighting it. Everything seemed so calm outside no one would guess there were clandestine fights held inside the bar. After a few minutes the door opened, the woman standing next to Sam "So, have you decided?"_

_Sam took one more drag from the cigarette before talking "yeah, I'm going to stay a while, see what New Orleans has to offer"_

_The woman smiled knowingly "I have an empty place no too far from here; it's really just a small room but you…"_

"_Wait" Sam stood up watching into the woman's eyes "Why are you doing this?, What makes you think I can fight in the first place, just because I punched some girl?"_

_The woman seemed unfazed by Sam "Pretty much" the woman said gaining a confused look from Sam "You knocked out the best fighter in there with one single punch" Sam mouth formed into a silent "oh" before sitting again in the bench looking straight ahead "and believe it or not but you do look like you could use some friends" the words made Sam look up, face serious before dropping her gaze again._

_"Maybe" Sam's words were low just enough for the other woman to hear them._

"_I'm Jenna by the way but you can call me Jen"_

"_Sam" She didn't notice the woman giving her a sympathetic look or when she went inside leaving her with her own thoughts, and the smoke of her cigarette._

The shift had ended without her realizing it, she was in the same spot of the night she decided to stay in new orleans, the same chilly breeze and the same smoke from her cigarette, probably the same thoughts in ther head.

"It looks like some things never change" the voice made Sam freeze her hand with her cigarette midway, a cold chill running down her spine, five years of wanting to hear her voice but afraid of doing so "you still smoke the same brand" Sam hesitates turning, like being afraid of finding an empty space from where her voice came from, but when she does her heart pounds harder finding Carly standing a few feet away.


	4. Life happened

**Thank you all for your reviews, it gave me the push to finish the chapter, im nervious because this is it, the first chapter where this two interact, it's short but i really hope you like it**

**.**

From her spot a few feet away Carly doesn't move for a while and Sam spends it reminiscing every detail she can; her skin as pale as she remembered, still with her petit form her body without much change, she did look thinner and her hair cascading in soft waves making it look shorter.

Carly starts walking towards Sam, small steps like one does nearing a stray cat and sits next to her, the cigarette pack and lighter between them, she takes one out of the pack and lights it with too much ease.

Sam thoughts went on about if Carly would smoke the entire cigarette now, how many she would smoke a day, one or two, maybe a whole pack. She doesn't understand why she's thinking this of all things, but watching here smoke the cigarette with ease, the answer is pretty obvious and thinking about it she responds "Some do"

Her voice startles Carly a little, like not been ready to hear it, even after so much time of wanting to; it makes her falter and squeeze the cigarette between her fingers. Inspecting the twisted cigarettes and deciding it was ruined she tosses it to the ground "you got hurt" she motioned to her own eyebrow not fully looking at Sam, avoiding eye contact.

"I've had worst" Sam said, starting to chew on a forgotten split on her bottom lip.

"Yes you have" The brunet said nodding, not talking about your fights in the bar "and I don't think me telling you how dangerous it is would make a difference"

It probably would, if she would tell her to never do it again she would stop in a heartbeat, for her, Carly used to know this but now, after all this years she didn't blame her for doubting it "no, I guess it wouldn't" the blonde responded "it pays the bills though"

"You could do something else for that"

"I've never been good at anything else really" Sam started to taste blood and realizes she had deepen the wound on her lip making it bleed, bringing the back of her hand to smear the blood out of her lip.

Carly just bit her lips forcing herself from saying something, like that what she said wasn't true, but it wasn't her job to reassure the blonde, not anymore.

Sam's felt a rush of cold wind wrapping her jacket a little tighter, it was a special chilly night in the city, her eyebrows furrowed slowly with a thought "How did.." Sam's words faltered, trying to make sense of something before voicing it out "How did you find me?"

Carly only tilted her head, thinking and deciding what or how much to explain herself "My dad"

"Your dad?" Sam eyes widened, looking extremely confused

"Yes, I asked for his help, he has…connections" she tried out seeing if that answer was it enough.

"But he…"Sam started but was quickly interrupted by Carly

"You got your driver license renewed last year, the only paperwork you've made in years"

"Oh" Sam blow up air from her mouth, she didn't know you could get located by that, she wondered how good connections Carly's dad must have, but then it didn't really make sense. On the other hand Carly has known where she's been for the last year but hadn't look out for her until now, she didn't have any right to but it still hurt her "I don't even own a car" she chuckle "I just do some errands for the bar"

Sam opens her mouth but not words made it pass it, hesitantly she tries again "I've missed you" Sam said with a little glaze in her eyes and a hard exhale

With those words Carly finally turned to looked at her, eyes finally meeting with her own, the brunet gulps almost painfully, either Sam's words or the cold air produced a chill to run through her body crossing her arms guarding herself from it, she didn't expect it to be so cold in New Orleans and the jacket she's wearing seems to be too thin for the weather. Sam notices this and starts removing her own but before it gets past her shoulders Carly's voice stops her "Don't" her tone leaves her struck for a moment and readjusts her jacket back, a small sigh leaving the blonde "I'm really trying not to lose it here, talking to you, been near you" Carly shut's her eyes while speaking.

"I know" Sam's exhales the last of her cigarette and throws it to ground

"No you don't" She didn't shout the words nor where accusing her, only an ugly chuckle attached to them that Sam has never heard on Carly before. Carly broke their gaze once again, like not been able to look at her and it pains Sam.

Sam continues watching her, jaw pressed together painfully before speaking, her voice more deep and steady "I do" she grabs at the end of the sit with both hands hard, her knuckles white "because that's exactly…"

Before Sam can finish Carly stands up abruptly from her spot, walking a few steps in front shaking her head "You can't say does words now and expect me to believe them to be true"

Sam stands and walks to stand right beside her, looking at her "They are" Carly only crossed her arms bracing herself still trying to avoid looking at her, Sam moving again tilting down her head slightly to stand just in her line of view "Look me in the eyes and tell me I'm lying, because you know me better than anyone"

This time Carly does look at her straight in the eyes, a hard look in her "I used to, at least I think I did, but then again you left" Sam straightens up a little, taken by Carly's words "Because you told how much you loved me, and then you disappeared"

Sam's swallows hard before talking again, Carly intense gaze still on her "That doesn't mean they weren't true"

Carly just blinks before an ugly smile makes it to her face "Then what were them?" Carly raises one hand to her side, palm spread wide "because you don't leave the people you're supposed to love"

"It wasn't…I…" Sam's words wouldn't come out before closing her eyes, and biting her bottom lip, hissing a little forgetting her parted lip.

"Why?" Sam's eyes opened at the exhausted and desperate sound of Carly's voice "Why did you leave?" This time it was Sam's turn to avoid Carly's eyes turning her head "What happened?"

Sam's gaze stayed away from Carly for a while, her whole body raisin with her while breathing before exhaling, shoulders up giving the only answer she could came up with "Life Carly" she shook her head slightly "Life happened"

Carly's narrowed her eyes at Sam for a second and tilted her head to the right "You really need to do better than that"

"I don't think I can"

"I think you do, I think I deserve it"

Sam stepped back and away from Carly, shoving her hands inside her jacket pockets "If this is what you came for, I don't think you're gonna get it" she adjusted her jacket on her while lowering her gaze to the floor.

"What else would I come for?" said Carly with a little disdain on purpose.

Sam's eyes met her, hurt face was evident as her eyes blinked rapidly without control, disguising it as quickly as she could "Nothing I guess" her tone suddenly was dull and cold "then I guess you better leave"

Carly was too taken back by Sam's words but didn't show it, only hardening her face "No, not until you give me a reason"

"Well that's too bad" Sam forced a mocking smile, the one a long time ago she gave to the teachers whenever she was told to do something.

"Just tell me and…and then I'm gone, just tell me truth" Carly tried to look as uninterested as she could.

Sam just look up to the sky for a moment, then sighing "It doesn't matter now, it's just…"

"It matters to me, because it's the one thing in my life I can't stop thinking about"

Sam just shook her head "I can't" and started turning, giving Carly her back and starting to walk away.

"Sam" Carly shouted her name, saying it for the first time after all this time, it made her stop dead in her tracks, Carly's voice wavering with pure emotion "Just…stop running , whatever it is, we can fix it"

Sam half turned, giving only her profile to Carly "It's too late for that"

"No it's not, just tell me" all façade was out of her voice.

Sam hesitated several times giving in, her face contorting before responding, her voice the saddest and most broken Carly has ever heard her "My mom died Carly"

Seeing Sam like that almost made Carly cry instantly, resisting the urge to move towards her, but still the confusion evident in her face. Sam was telling her this like it was the missing piece in the puzzle that somehow made everything make perfect sense, but it was a piece that she already knew about and could never forget.

**.**

**Your reviews are kindly appreciated, either to comment or as a critic. Thanks**


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